Quickly, our retreats grew–where this year we have already had 2 retreats of 450 moms at each (totaling 900 adoption moms in attendance!). Just before the January retreat, I told our planning team that once again the Lord was putting “25 moms” on my heart. I told the team I felt the Lord was asking us to use Created for Care as a resource for the moms called to come–to turn around and take Created for Care home–to their churches and community.

At every Created for Care retreat, we receive A LOT of requests to have the next Created for Care in this city or that, to have one big one or to have regional ones, to have this breakout session or that. We listen to and pray over every request, but ultimately what it comes down to is this: What is God’s purpose? What is He calling us to do? What does He want to happen next?

We would LOVE to be on tour full time taking retreats to every region to serve as many moms as possible, BUT–this isn’t where we feel the Lord is calling us (for now). We feel He is calling us to plan retreats right where we are (which happens to be the cheapest region to conduct a retreat in…trust us–we’ve done our research and if you fly any where for a retreat you want it to be here because it’s half the cost as other regions/states requested). We also have to take into account our families, so for now–we feel the Lord is asking us to be faithful to that which He has called us to. And the next step?

25 moms.

I was a little blown away when a Created for Care mom, Paige Nachtigal, contacted me JUST after the January retreat to ask if she could do something. I was blown away–because what she asked was the exact vision I had just shared with our Created for Care planning team. Paige wanted to take what she received at the C4C retreat BACK to Nebraska–and invite other moms to come for a weekend retreat–to receive rest and refreshment…to receive encouragement from the main session DVDs and breakout CDs from C4C…and to create community among adoption moms in her area.

We put together C4C items for her mini-retreat’s welcome packet…similar to things received at the January and March retreat. We shipped everything off…and we prayed for the FIRST C4C mini-retreat! And…it was a complete success! Thank you Paige and your team in Nebraska for following the Lord in what He laid on your heart. How encouraging to watch this as this is the EXACT thing that has been on ours–sweet confirmation that this truly is from the Lord and part of his “next” plan for Created for Care!

We will be working with Paige, her team and others to created “C4C mini Retreat Packets” for 2013. We encourage ANY mom who is interested in having a “mini” to come to one of our retreats in 2013! We will have a special breakout session JUST for you to equip you to take this home and bless 25 moms. How amazing it will be to see how many moms are reached and how the Lord might use these “mini” retreats to expand our territory and bless more families!

Here is Paige’s blog entry on this original vision being put into action:

mini-retreat by Paige Nachtigal

as i sat in a group of 400+ women, i was reminded that so many others needed to hear what i was hearing. a little voice kept reminding me to bring it home to the others. more than anything i wanted to bottle the sights, sounds, joy, hope and friendship. then i wanted to gather those others who had adopted around me and open the bottle. i wanted to anoint them with what i had experienced. i wanted to see their hearts respond to a Savior who loves them with an indescribable love.

last friday and saturday i had that opportunity.

our local his hands of hope ministry partnered with created for care and held a mini-retreat.

not only did created for care allow us to purchase and use the videos and mp3s from the original retreat in january, they also came along side of us with ideas, prayer and encouragement. we were able to purchase bags, mugs and journals to bless the sweet women with.

sadly enough those gifts had not appeared on friday before i left to help with set-up. but the hubster brought them over on saturday morning. you would have thought we were all four years old and it was christmas morning. so excited to see that box. thanks andrea and the c4c team.

our retreat was a sweet time of fellowship and restoration.

an older adoptive mom from our church allowed us to have the retreat at her beautiful home. she has a fantastic set-up and the true gift of hospitality. what a blessing. thank you again debby!

the retreat started out with dinner (the team provided the meals). then moved downstairs for a little worship and the video of session #1.

after the session we pulled out the most gianormous display of junk food i have seen since my jr high slumber party days. pretty spectacular!

we all changed into our pajamas (well most of us did) for our panel time. however, instead of a panel we just all shared about our families that God had put together. it took 4 hours and ended around 2 in the morning. what a beautiful time of hearing how God is in the details of our lives.

one thing i loved about our time together is that young women and older women and women in-between lost all their boundaries of age. we shared from our hearts. we took turns listening. we learned and heard and cried. it was amazing hearing the stories of women with now grown children. it was beautiful to see an adoptive mom and her grown adoptive daughter tag-team sharing their story. it was fun to encourage the moms who are waiting or those whose travel was imminent. some of our stories are funny, some are sad, some are hard to hear, some are messy. all have such a precious thread running through them. a thread of redemption. a thread of hope.

i am thankful that God is not finished in my life, in the life of little bit, in the lives of these women and their children. He is not finished. there is still time.

in the morning we ate a yummy breakfast provided by tami and started our second session. which followed by a date with God. we had 4 different stations.

puzzle station

river rock station

watercolor station

communion

while the ladies went through the different stations i pulled out my guitar and played.

of course the weather began to act crazy, we are in kansas. you know dorothy and all. so after a wonderful lunch provided by gail, we decided to make a few changes to our schedule. we had originally planned to go on a little outing. we thought a trip to a few antique stores and a cup of coffee would be nice. however, we cancelled due to the weather and just did the last two sessions.

we ended with another fabulous meal provided by marla. she is an amazing woman, with such a heart for adoption. she and her hubby have a little one (who was loved on by many ladies), who knows who God may add to their family in the future. she is part of the his hands for hope team. what a blessing to know her and minister with her.

there are so many people who helped to make our retreat a success. our team; gail, tami and marla. our hostess, debby. all of the ladies who came to the retreat. the created for care team. God.

thank you debby and gail for the photos.
if there is one thing i could impress upon you from our time together it would be this…you can do this too. you (i am sure) have the resources to encourage and bless other adoptive moms in your midst. there is probably someone near you that is hurting, that needs a word of encouragement, that is dying for a hug. you can do that.

this will not be the end, rather just a beginning of the ways to reach out to others. to reach through our own pain to help in the strong name of Jesus. that is the only way for any of us to find hope.

through His hands of hope.

• African American Haircare with African American Hair Stylist Nisia Murray and her lovely Regan & adoptive mom Erica Shubin. (Come learn about different hair textures, hair products and simple styles) Get ready to laugh and be entertained by Nisia–and of course…there will be time for lots of Q&A at the end!
• Adoption Mom Panel - Join in the fun as we ask questions about how these moms prepared, adjusted and pressed helping them thrive throughout the years of adjusting as a growing adoption family. When you sign up, if you choose to attend this session you can submit a few questions you would like to have answered too! Join us as Andrea Young (C4C mom and “Babe of My Heart” blog) asks our panel of adoption moms with Angie Gue (domestic adoption/open adoption momma of 4), Gwen Oatsvall (147 Million Orphans Mom), Beth Templeton (Hope at Home), Amy Monroe (Empowered to Connect/Tapestry), Aimee Powell (Third Day wife & adoptive mom), Shelly Owens (Sixty Feet & “Good to be Crazy”  blog), Cris Peters (C4C Breakout Session Leader)
• Creative Quiet Time - It’s time to change our minds and routines for our quiet times with God.With the physical and emotional demands of parenting, not to mention the lack of alone time, how can we satisfy our spiritual needs?  The Good News is that God has a plan to meet all your needs and it’s all about His love and  desire to be with you.  Come hear and experience new ways to increase your personal intimacy with the Lord and share some of your discoveries, too! (Jenni Means)
• Support 101 - Are you attending this year’s Created for Care retreat with your friend or family member simply to support them on this new journey in their life? IF SO–then this breakout session is for YOU! Come here from April Carlock and other adoption family support as they share ways you can better support your friend or family member adopting before, during and after they’re home! Come here as they confess what they wish they would have done, what they know they did well and how you can be a greater support to helping other families thrive after they are home! This is ALSO a calling–and a very important role that you, too, can play and educate others in also!
• FUNdraising Your Adoption - Come be inspired in different ways to fund your adoption! Join Kelly Putty of Ordinary Hero as she shares unique and fun ways to raise money for your adoption AND how Ordinary Hero can also help. Kelly will be sharing how their organization supports adoptions through grants and learn about the other ministries also at C4C are available to help you too!

Saturday, Breakout Session 2 –  1:30 – 3:00pm

• Holistic Orphan Care: Becoming an Orphan Advocate Right Where You Are. Just like the lyrics of Sara Groves’ song, “I saw what I saw and I can’t forget it”, so many of us want to know- now what? What do we do now that we know? And how do we truly carry out the call of James 1:27closeJames 1:27 27 Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. (ESV) closeJames 1:27closeJames 1:27 27 Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. (ESV) 27 Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world. (ESV) to serve orphans in their distress? Join adoption moms and other ministry leaders who have begun ministries modeled after that call as we discuss ways that empower, rehabilitate and provide relief to orphans around the world. We will discuss holistic models, how-tos of international ministry and ministry through your home church. Led by Kara Portillo of Into The Streets of Ethiopia, April Carlock of Wiphan Care Ministries and Traci Weldie of Safe Families
• News about HIV & Orphans and Realistic Expectations in Adoption -Dr. Susan Hillis, HIV research scientist, will be sharing news about HIV concerning orphans in today’s world. Then hear from adoption mom Amy Levy  and hear her personal journey of saying yes to HIV adoption–a stories that will encourage you and bless you as an every day family followed the Lord on this beautiful journey of adoption.
  
•  “Identity, Adoption and Racism: What America taught me about me” - This interactive session will help individuals explore what it means to be a person of color and be an adoptee in America, and how both impact one’s identity. This session will be both interactive and informative and develop a greater awareness of the challenging and sensitive reality for those who may look a little different from the average American. Join Carissa Woodwyk as she shares and teaches from her personal experience as a Korean-born adoptee.
• Yes, you CAN do this! Encouraging and Equipping Moms for Post-Adoption Success – We wait and wait–and then we bring our new one home, many times findig ourselves tired, feeling unequipped and not connected to our child. Come be encouraged by Cris Peters with practical steps and ways to get through the first days, weeks and months–and ultimately create a strong foundation for your family to grow together on.
• Adoption from the Inside Out – Empowered to Connect Session 1 -One of the most often overlooked aspects of the adoption and foster care journey is the need for parents to turn the focus on themselves in terms of dealing with their own past hurts and losses, looking honestly and realistically at their motivations and expectations and learning what it means to be “fully present” with their children.  “Adoption from the Inside Out” — is necessary if parents are to help their children experience healing and transformation. This process requires that parents be willing to look back and make sense of their own past, look forward and honestly examine their motivations and expectations, in order to be free in each and every moment to be “fully emotionally present” with their children to help them heal and become all that God has created them to be. (Amy Monroe with Empowered to Connect)
• The Joys and Challenges of Parenting a Child with Special Needs - This breakout session is led by two moms with two very different but amazing special needs adoption journeys. Come be encouraged and inspired from Gwen Oatsvall and Teresa Grimes–how their journeys began, how the unexpected has changed their families and how blessed they feel as they continue to trust the Lord through this ever-changing and miraculous journey. (Practical Q&A time at the end)
• Nurturing Your Marriage There is no greater blessing we can give our children than a strong marriage. And yet many of us find that the ongoing issues of adoption can sometimes actually diminish intimacy and communication with our husbands. In this session we will be encouraged as wives and women to love our husbands well amidst the competing demands of mothering. (Beth Templeton)

Saturday,  Breakout Session 3 3:30 – 5:00pm

• Attachment & Practical Realities of Connecting While Correcting – Empowered to Connect Session 2 - Adoptive and foster parents realize that connection is essential to help their children develop trust, heal, and grow. But they know that correction (i.e., discipline) is also important. This session will focus on practical insights and strategies for parents who want to better understand the “how and why” of connecting and correcting. Using a variety of everyday situations for parents of children of all ages, this session will illustrate the principles and strategies developed and taught by Dr. Karyn Purvis, co-author of The Connected Child. (Amy Monroe) [This session follows the 1st Empowered to Connect session well--but they also stand alone. We do recommend buying the track to both of these sessions if you are a pre-adoption family and are unable to attend both sessions. ]
• Adoption in the U.S. - Domestic Adoption , Open Adoption, Foster Care & Foster-to-Adopt with Aimee Powell, Jennifer Schiltz and Angie Gue. – Aimee Powell (wife to Mac Powell of Third Day) will share their family’s journey in domestic adoption.  Jennifer Schiltz will be sharing her journey through foster care and fostering to adopt.  Angie Gue, an adoptive mom, with three very beautiful open adoptions will be sharing insight on how to trust the Lord through the twists and turns in open adoption–and how beautiful it really can be. This session will also talk about needs in the US–as well as different domestic topics including open adoption, foster care and foster-to-adopt.
• Helping Your Child Know and Experience God with Jenni Means and Andrea Young – Our heart’s desire as mothers is to see our children walking full of faith in a love relationship with God. We will explore ways to create anatmosphere and culture where it is natural for our children to encounter Jesus, to know their Heavenly Father, and be sensitive to the Holy Spirit. We will learn ways to help us hear God as parents and to help our children hear the voice of God for themselves.  This is a real key to break the orphan spirit and come fully into our identity as sons and daughters of the Lord. The second part of the session will focus on practical things you can do with your children to encourage them in their walks with the Lord. If you are in the middle of a time of WAITING–what better way to spend this time before new transitions begin than pressing into Jesus together.
• “I Drive a Bus” - Get ready to laugh and enjoy this session with some of our favorite bus-driving adoption mommas and how they thrive as they grow. Come hear how they not only survive but thrive as a growing family. The laundry, the homework, sports, date night (really–a date night?!), romance (really–that too?), connecting with each child and loving their mommy callings. You are in for a real treat and this session–just might be OFF the record with these ladies giving you information they’d never blog about;-) (147 mom Gwen Oatsvall, Third Day wife and mom Shannon Anderson, Andria Parker,  Amie Swaddling (www.lovethemhome.com) & Colleen Jobe from Wild Olive (www.myuglycouch.com)
• Parenting In Grace - What does the Good News of God’s Unmerited Favor look like in our homes? How does it affect and inform how we parent? Does an understanding of the difference between Law and Grace cause us to parent differently than our worldly neighbors? Let’s take a look at how we can love our precious children according to the gospel, bringing forth LIFE into every area of these lives entrusted to our care. This session is led by Beth Templeton of “Hope at Home”.
• Practical Advice for Parents in Wisdom and Revelation - An interview with Shelly Owens and Susan Hillis on practical parenting your biological and adopted children. This interview session was a no-brainer for us after we heard how Shelly was impacted from a mommy/coffee interview with practical parenting with Susan Hillis. So impactful–we want to share it with each of you! We so often hear teaching on how to deeply love and connect with our children. In this session, the day-to-day is painted for you–giving you practical nuggets learned from this mom of 10 to take home and apply right now with your family.
• Fasten Your Sweet Belt:  Older Child Adoption Adopting an older child comes with its distinct challenges but equally rewarding joys.  If God is calling you to older children who wait, don’t be afraid!  This session will explore the unique aspects of cleaving an older child into your family.  Using personal stories and testimonials from older adoptees, we will discuss what it is like for the adoptee and the parents. Come learn what a beautiful miracle can happen when you open your home and heart to an older child who has prayed for you to come. Jodi is the author of “Fasten Your Sweet Belt: 10 Things You Need to Know About Older Child Adoption.” 
• Hanging Tough: Seeking God in a Difficult Season with Traci Weldie - As pre-adoptive moms we hear all about things like RAD, FASD, PTSD, ODD, ADHD and our heads swirl. And while we prepare by reading and talking to other moms, we really never think OUR chosen child that God has clearly led us to will have any of these.  But then, you realize he does.   Now what?  Where do we turn?  How do we get through this?  Come hear from fellow adoptive moms who are living with RAD, ODD, PTSD, ADHD and listen to their stories of encouragement and hope.

***Friday sessions will not be recorded. If you can’t decide–all Saturday breakouts will be recorded and available for purchase.

Friday, 01/27/2012 Breakout Session 1 4:30 – 5:30pm

Pick one of the breakouts to attend following registration & Check-In on Friday…

• Blogger Panel sharing Using Your Blog as Ministry with Lovelyn (Moments with Love), Missy (It’s Almost Naptime), Kristi (We love our Lucy), Lara (The Farmers Wife Tells All), Gwen and Suzanne (147 Million Orphans)
• African American Haircare with African American Hair Stylist Nisia Murray and her lovely Regan assisting (Come learn about different hair textures, hair products and simple styles) Get ready to laugh and be entertained by Nisia–and of course…there will be time for lots of Q&A at the end!
• Photography 101 with professional photographers Shannon Holden and Tammy Dugger. Come learn and be inspired by Shannon of Shannon Holden Photography and her sidekick Tammy Dugger.  Shannon’s work is published in boutiques, catalogs, online publications and “Professional Photographer” magazine. Tammy, a former professional photographer, will be tag-teaming this session with Shannon. For mom’s who don’t have time to take photography classes–this will be a real treat!
• Creative Quiet Time - It’s time to change our minds and routines for our quiet times with God.With the physical and emotional demands of parenting, not to mention the lack of alone time, how can we satisfy our spiritual needs?  The Good News is that God has a plan to meet all your needs and it’s all about His love and  desire to be with you.  Come hear and experience new ways to increaseyour personal intimacy with the Lord and share some of your discoveries, too! (Jenni Means)
• FUNdraising Your Adoption - Come be inspired in different ways to fund your adoption. Martha Cook of Promise686 will be sharing how their organization supports local adoptions through grants and how your church can potentially do this too.  Also hear from ministries who are here to simply assist families with ways to fundraise, and find out how to get going with creative fundraising with their ministries!

Saturday, 1/28/2012 Breakout Session 2 2:00 – 3:30pm

• News about HIV & Orphans and Realistic Expectations in Adoption - Dr. Susan Hillis, HIV research scientist, will be sharing news about HIV concerning orphans in today’s world. Then hear from Suzanne Mayernick (one of the 147 Million Orphans mom) and hear her personal journey of saying yes to HIV adoption.
• Orphans in the U.S. - Domestic Adoption , Open Adoption, Foster Care & Foster-to-Adopt – Aimee Powell (wife to Mac Powell of Third Day) will be sharing their family’s journey through domestic adoption. This session will also talk about needs in the US–as well as different domestic topics including open adoption, foster care and foster-to-adopt. Angie Gue, an adoptive mom, with three very beautiful open adoptions will be sharing insight on how to trust the Lord through the twists and turns in open adoption–and how beautiful it really can be.

• Yes, you CAN do this! Encouraging and Equipping Moms for Post-Adoption Success – We wait and wait and wait–and then we bring our new one home…and many times find ourselves tired, feeling unequipped and not connected to our child. Come be encouraged by Cris Peters with practical steps and ways to get through the first days, weeks and months–and ultimately create a strong foundation for your family to grow together on. This is a perfect session for mom’s waiting, close to referral or newly home.
• Empowered to Connect (Session 1)- Adoption from the Inside Out - One of the most often overlooked aspects of the adoption and foster care journey is the need for parents to turn the focus on themselves in terms of dealing with their own past hurts and losses, looking honestly and realistically at their motivations and expectations and learning what it means to be “fully present” with their children.  “Adoption from the Inside Out” — is necessary if parents are to help their children experience healing and transformation. This process requires that parents be willing to look back and make sense of their own past, look forward and honestly examine their motivations and expectations, in order to be free in each and every moment to be “fully emotionally present” with their children to help them heal and become all that God has created them to be. (Amy Monroe with Empowered to Connect)
• The Joys and Challenges of Parenting a Child with Special Needs - This breakout session is led by two moms with two very different but amazing special needs adoption journeys. Come be encouraged and inspired from Emily Alexander and Gwen Oatsvall–how their journeys began, how the unexpected has changed their families and how blessed they feel as they continue to trust the Lord through this ever-changing and miraculous journey. (Practical Q&A time at the end)
• Nurturing Your Marriage There is no greater blessing we can give our children than a strong marriage. And yet many of us find that the ongoing issues of adoption can sometimes actually diminish intimacy and communication with our husbands. In this session we will be encouraged as wives and women to love our husbands well amidst the competing demands of mothering. (Beth Templeton)

Saturday, 1/28/2012 Breakout Session 3 3:45 – 5:15pm

• Empowered to Connect (Session 2) – Attachment & Practical Realities of Connecting While Correcting - Adoptive and foster parents realize that connection is essential to help their children develop trust, heal, and grow. But they know that correction (i.e., discipline) is also important. This session will focus on practical insights and strategies for parents who want to better understand the “how and why” of connecting and correcting. Using a variety of everyday situations for parents of children of all ages, this session will illustrate the principles and strategies developed and taught by Dr. Karyn Purvis, co-author of The Connected Child. (Amy Monroe) [This session follows the 1st Empowered to Connect session well--but they also stand alone. We do recommend buying the track to both of these sessions if you are a pre-adoption family and are unable to attend both sessions. ]
• Helping Your Child Know and Experience God Our heart’s desire as mothers is to see our children walking full of faith in a love relationship with God. We will explore ways to create an atmosphere and culture where it is natural for our children to encounter Jesus, to know their Heavenly Father, and be sensitive to the Holy Spirit. We will learn ways to help us hear God as parents and to help our children hear the voice of God for themselves.  This is a real key to break the orphan spirit and come fully into our identity as sons and daughters of the Lord

• When Your Quiver is Full, But Your Heart Longs to Love More: Becoming an Orphan Advocate Right Where You Are - Come learn how you can get involved and be used greatly to serve orphans right where you are RIGHT now! Come hear from different ministries that all began through adoption families, and learn how you can join them and use your gifts to serve orphans all over the world.
• “I Drive a Bus” - Get ready to laugh and enjoy this session with some of our favorite bus-driving adoption mommas and how they they thrive as they grow. Come hear how they not only survive but thrive as a growing family. The laundry, the homework, sports, date night (really–a date night?!), romance (really–that too?), connecting with each child and loving their mommy callings. You are in for a real treat and this session–just might be OFF the record with these ladies giving you information they’d never blog about;-) (147 moms, Emily Alexander, Joy Portis & Kristi Johnson)
• Parenting In Grace - What does the Good News of God’s Unmerited Favor look like in our homes? How does it affect and inform how we parent? Does an understanding of the difference between Law and Grace cause us to parent differently than our worldly neighbors? Let’s take a look at how we can love our precious children according to the gospel, bringing forth LIFE into every area of these lives entrusted to our care.
• Practical Advice for Parents in Wisdom and Revelation - An interview with Shelly Owens and Susan Hillis on practical parenting your biological and adopted children. This interview session was a no-brainer for us after we heard how Shelly was impacted from a mommy/coffee interview with practical parenting with Susan Hillis. So impactful–we want to share it with each of you! We so often hear teaching on how to deeply love and connect with our children. In this session, the day-to-day is painted for you–giving you practical nuggets learned from this mom of 10 to take home and apply right now with your family.

Here is a sneak peak in our we got our weekend started…with this slideshow with just a tiny glimpse of some of the families represented there. Thank you to all who sent in pictures! Truly, God has great plans for your family and your children! More to come on the weekend…but it was INCREDIBLE and what a blessing it was to have a weekend of learning, encouragement, worship and community with so many moms with the same heartbeat!

I have never experienced fatique and the weight of burdens more in my life than after we brought home our newest son. Would he be okay? What would he be like in 10 or 20 years? Would he experience healing? Both physically…emotionally…mentally? Could I really do this??? Was I going to fail? What would the world think when I did? The unknowns compiled–and my shoulders would grow heavy…and again–I would come to the conclusion…that NO–*I* could NOT do this on my own. I truly needed His strength, power and miraculous life-giving transformation in EVERY area of this calling.

I realized that I probably wasn’t alone in my need to COME TO HIS WELL…daily, hourly…minute-by-minute. You have to help me Lord…my cry over and over again. There are times in our mommy lives–times in our new stages and callings where we not only are called away daily…but there are times where we need to come away to be refreshed, rested, restored…and retreat. As moms of new ones who have attachment issues and special needs–it can be especially hard for us to feel the FREEDOM to retreat. BUT–just as God is able to BE ENOUGH for us–God is also able to be enough for our husbands and children when we need to retreat and be refreshed…to do nothing other than come to HIS well.

As I write–I can’t help think about what Jesus had at stake when he retreated to be with the Father. By the world’s view, “Are you serious? RIGHT NOW Jesus??? You are just gonna scoot on to a quiet time and pray??? In my opinion Jesus–you should either be running for your life OR fighting back…fighting for us Lord. What in the world are you thinking?” I am sure many of you moms will be struggingly in a few weeks preparing to leave your family’s for the weekend to come to the Created for Care retreat—and maybe some of you are reading this months after it is written and you are struggling with a need to come to His well and feeling guilty for the need to get away. One, let me say this–guilt to come to retreat to be with the Lord is never from the Lord. Two, the Lord is able to be enough for your children and husband–and begin praying now that they, too, experience healing and restorement in miraculous ways as you come to Him to be restored. Three, the Lord desires for you to come to Him…come to His well–and be filled with more of Him…and for your children to see mommy doing this–is the greatest healing power of all.

I asked one of our speakers from the weekend for some insight on this as she retreats often to be with the Lord. She had adopted a handful of little ones–who are now big ones…but they came home as both children and teens. I consider her one of my adoption mommy mentors and I wanted a second voice from this godly momma to share with you all as you plan to come…a word from Beth Templeton about getting away during your first months or year/s home with a newly adopted child…

“I would say to these moms that in going to this retreat they are modeling something very important to their children and that even though, of course, their little ones don’t want them to go (a normal and healthy response of any child), their going will speak good things to each little one.

Firstly that mommies need God and sometimes do things especially just to be with Him. It is a good thing to go away to be with God and something that people who love God do. And also, the child will see that when mommy goes and when she/he feels so scared about that, it all turns out well because mommy comes back–despite the fears that she wouldn’t or that something bad might happen. The only way for a child, especially an adopted child, to know this for certain is to face the fears, feel the lack, and find out that all is well after all.

With the children old enough I would suggest that the mothers show them the website, tell them in simple terms about what she will learn, show them where on the map she will be, pictures of the hotel….. show them on the calendar when she will be home. Possibly make a special count down of some sort. Also, leave little notes (drawings for the child too young to read)/gifts for each day she is gone. If the child doesn’t already have one, a little photo album with pictures of the mom and the rest of the family together is a good idea–this visually establishes the sense of belonging and safety. For the babies I think talking to them about these things even though they won’t understand the words will make the mom feel better about leaving and will communicate something to the child beyond the words themselves.

I also met with and talked to an attachment therapist and asked on a personal level–what her thoughts were about me getting away. She affirmed that one of the best things we can do is teach our children HOW to take care of ourselves and specifically our spiritual and emotional health by retreating and taking time to rest. By modeling this–we are teaching our children HOW to care for themselves. If we are spent and drained–then we are teaching them that this is how you live and care for yourself.

I love how Dr. Karyn Purvis in “The Connected Child” writes about the need for adoption moms to REFILL their bucket. (Maybe I especially love this because one of the talks given by Dr.Susan Hillis at the retreat is about being “women of the well”!) Dr.Purvis shares how “many parents who come to [them] for help–come suffering from emotional and physical exhaustion. It’s as if their fuses are blown. Over time, coping with at-risk children has eroded their social support, familial support, and marital support systems. Everyone is tired and the resources are diminished, so the challenges seem greater…On a basic physiological level, parents need to replenish themselves. It’s essential for the entire family’s well being. Without refilling your own bucket, you can’t effectively offer healing to your children.” (p.230-231).

I love this picture of refilling your own bucket–and how amazing is it that the Lord pressed Psalm 84closePsalm 84 My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) closePsalm 84closePsalm 84 My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) on our hearts to over and over again press on these 250 adoption moms’ hearts?! Go read Psalm 84closePsalm 84 My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) closePsalm 84closePsalm 84 My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) –in how the Lord wants us to live…AT HIS WELL…to go from SPRING TO SPRING…and WHERE does He want us to build our nests?? “near YOUR alter, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God” For many of us–we are just plain tired. If you are like me–you haven’t even been to Sunday school in 6 months because you last only through the announcements because you have a toddler on your hip you aren’t ready to leave in a nursery setting. YET–you feel the Lord saying…”Come away with me…I will give you rest.”

Truly–as Psalms 84closePsalm 84 My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) closePsalm 84closePsalm 84 My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) My Soul Longs for the Courts of the Lord To the choirmaster: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of the Sons of Korah. 84:1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
O Lord of hosts!
2 My soul longs, yes, faints
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and flesh sing for joy
to the living God. 3 Even the sparrow finds a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may lay her young,
at your altars, O Lord of hosts,
my King and my God.
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house,
ever singing your praise! Selah 5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
in whose heart are the highways to Zion.
6 As they go through the Valley of Baca
they make it a place of springs;
the early rain also covers it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength;
each one appears before God in Zion. 8 O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah
9 Behold our shield, O God;
look on the face of your anointed! 10 For a day in your courts is better
than a thousand elsewhere.
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly.
12 O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you! (ESV) says, “Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere”. I believe God wants to do something SO BIG in the hearts and LIVES of the 250 women (253 to be exact…our cup overfloweth just a bit;) who are coming. I believe He wants to meet each of them in a REAL, PERSONAL way. I believe He wants to restore, heal, bring rest and to simply BE WITH EACH WOMAN during this retreat…with no distractions of Cheerios being poured on the floor or diapers being changed (lest I also remind you that this, TOO, is worship!)–but I believe He has called 253 women to be with Him in a new way–so He may change her. He may equip her. He may love her in a real…WOW…and “I have longed for this in my weakness” kind of way. SO…that He may use her EVEN MORE for His glory.

We are praying for each of you as you prepare to come. He who calls will always equip…and He is always waiting at the spring of life…to fill your cup and even let it overflow.

Caring For You

Truly–you can read in just about any book the how-to’s, the statistics and different strategies of this-and-that when it comes to being an adoptive parent, but one thing we often fail or forget to do is to take care of YOU…to take care of ourselves as busy moms. I have to tell you–as I stepped out in faith to plan a retreat for adoptive moms BECAUSE I FELT LIKE I NEEDED IT I was blown away at how the Lord provided. EVERY session speaker and breakout leader has volunteered to come…volunteered to share their hearts and their expertise…and one thing that keeps echoing over and over in my mind is how the Lord has ALREADY provided for us by providing one another. In our culture, however, some times we miss the connections…and therefore, we some times miss seeing some of His sweetest provisions in and through His people.

After only being home from Ethiopia with our fourth child for a couple of months, the Lord laid this retreat on my heart. I thought maybe 25 ladies would join me–yet I felt the Lord telling me to be prepared for more. I found a pretty sweet location that would fit 50–but I felt the Lord saying no…so I listened and crazily felt led to a resort a little farther out that would serve 250 ladies. I met with April the event coordinator and I told her at most we would have 50…probably 25…

I went home and thought–who will lead our sessions together? NOT ME Lord…I need this retreat just as much as anyone else newly home…I’m weary, I’m tired, I’m not so confident in all this new attachment stuff…I know I need to connect with other moms and more of YOU time!!! Not me Lord:). I felt the Lord asking me to DREAM big. If I could have ANY speaker I wanted to come–who would it be. Well, after attending several adoption conferences I didn’t have to think long. I’d love someone like Susan Hillis (you’ll understand when you meet her)…I’d LOVE someone from Empowerd to Connect…I’d love an attachment therapist..and oh yeah Lord–NOT ME:). Then…just for kicks–I emailed all of these people…and truly you would not believe EACH and EVERY one of their replies…

The Lord had prepared them. They each had something like the visioin I had for the retreat on their hearts…and they EACH agreed to volunteer their time with NO speaking fees…because–well, they believed the Lord was all over this. WOW. I sat there cracking up with my husband that I had the most AMAZING women leading this retreat of maybe 25 ladies. And then–I put the sign up on my blog. In just 48 hours we had over 200 ladies sign up…wanting to come join us from ALL over the United States. I quickly had to take the sign up form down because we could only have so many for our first retreat…after all–I really don’t know what I’m doing but the LORD DOES…so I believe you are EACH in for a REAL treat.

I keep telling my husband God is truly up to something with these now almost 250 women (yes, I’m a sucker and had to slide a few more in until we burst!) Can you imagine over 200 adoption moms who would do anything for the Lord…change their families…walk through the hard parts of adoption with His beloved children because HE called them to…over 200 women with a passion for Christ, serving Him and following Him at all costs…and you put them ALL under ONE roof for ONE weekend??? Add some worship…lots of prayer…coffee and chocolate…and I believe you have a dream get away for these women–after all…if you saw them all together in a room—on the outside you might wonder what in the world they all in common. They are different ages…from different parts of the country…yanky accents and long Southern drawls like mine. And most of us some times we don’t quite fit in other womens retreats because the issues we now deal with are so different. But here–we will come together and have much in common…one being a cry of our hearts. To love those who need desperately our love…and to encourage one another in Christ along the way.

This retreat isn’t just about how we care for our little ones–but it’s about allowing others to care for us…and being cared for by our Creator. I have story after story after story of God’s amazing provision for this retreat. And how in the WORLD I’ve had any ounce of energy to work on it is beyond me–because it is HIS strength. And who knows–with that strength…you just might hear a word or two from me over the weekend…although I’m still telling Him…just NOT me:). Know that you cared for–and we are excited to care for you through His strength during this retreat. I pray your journey to the good ole South is paved smoothly…and know I’ll have a warm cup of coffee waiting for you when you get here.

God bless…and in His Care,
Andrea